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Literature Text
I still think about you
whenever I'm walking to class
or watching my favourite shows
or even writing poetry
Sometimes you're the last thing on my mind
before I fall asleep
Sometimes you're the first on my mind
when I wake up
Sometimes I wonder
what you're doing
how you're doing
and I want to ask
because I still care
But I can't ask
because we don't talk anymore
and I can't forgive myself
because I ruined that
I pushed you away
I drove you out
It's my fault
So I'll just sit here
wondering about what could be
wondering why I have to be like this
and missing you more than ever
whenever I'm walking to class
or watching my favourite shows
or even writing poetry
Sometimes you're the last thing on my mind
before I fall asleep
Sometimes you're the first on my mind
when I wake up
Sometimes I wonder
what you're doing
how you're doing
and I want to ask
because I still care
But I can't ask
because we don't talk anymore
and I can't forgive myself
because I ruined that
I pushed you away
I drove you out
It's my fault
So I'll just sit here
wondering about what could be
wondering why I have to be like this
and missing you more than ever
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I've given up on trying not to think about her, because whether I try or not she's on my mind almost all the time. The guilt is eating me alive. Literally all I want to do is apologise for everything and be forgiven for everything that I did, but I know that I can't because I don't deserve that kind of closure. If there is any kind of closure when I can't apologise, I don't know where to find it.
© 2015 - 2024 CaelansFolly1992
Comments8
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I know you probably don't want to hear this, but... You do deserve the closure. You deserve to do something for yourself - not only that, you seem to need it. It won't make you happy, but it will help you be at peace. I'm in the business of punishing myself, too. Just give it one try. Please. I don't know your circumstances and I don't mean to intrude, but I know what it feels like and you don't deserve it anymore.